Working on goals...

...is both harder and easier than I thought it would be. When I created my list of daily goals, it helped bring into focus the parts of my life which I wanted to improve. And, it turns out that I want to improve a wide range of things from body, mind and spirit. This makes me happy. I think I may have set the bar too high for myself at first though. Knowing that I need to write for two hours, and knowing that I need to exercise for an hour makes me kind of overwhelmed, which doesn't let me get started. Baby steps...baby steps...

Exercise today: 2 hours of Ultimate practice

Things I learned today about babies.

Today and went to visit No Name Yet and her brand new daughter, Drew. And so I figured that I would write down some things that I learned. I've taken care of babies before, but never any that are 12 days old (!!).

1) Drew is very tiny.
2) Tiny babies have HUGE SCREAMS when being changed.
3) Babies smell really nice. (Actually, I knew that, but I got reminded.)
4) Drew is really very tiny.
5) Babies can sleep through phones, game shows, dogs yapping and sneezes.
6) New moms can also sleep through phones, game shows, dogs yapping and sneezes.
7) SHE'S SO LITTLE!! Every part is so tiny!
8) Baby hiccups are really cute...at least for the first little while.
9) When you're resting a sleeping infant on your stomach, they will jump when your stomach gurgles.
10) My God, she's so little!

I suck

Well, I got an hour of writing done this morning. I guess that's ok considering that I worked for eight hours today.

Got another student. :) I'll be starting with him on Wednesday.

And I made a bunch of flower barrettes from silk flowers I bought at work. They're pretty. :)

Ok, that's it. I'm going to bed. I teach way too fricking early tomorrow.

Oh, and it's Kittens's birthday in two days. I have part of her present already. :) This is good. Maybe I'll take her out for dinner.

Um...huh?

From MSN

"The Week in Pictures: A cat bath, Gaza strife & other striking images"
The picture is a white cat looking kind of pissed off at being all soapy.

Does anyone else think that maybe pictures of a cat bath aren't exactly in the same league as pictures of "Gaza strife"? Although, having never tried to give a cat a bath...maybe it IS in the same league. Cats can give nasty scratches...

BBQ

Going to Meesh's barbeque tonight. While I check email and stuff, my amazing boyfriend is making me a chicken club sandwich. :D Me likes.

I dyed my hair this afternoon. For some reason the last two times I've done that I've gone to karate that day...kind of a bad thing when one wears a white uniform and is getting chucked onto a pale yellow, absorbant floor. :/ I can't really tell that I did it...I think it just refreshed the burgandy that it was before. I'll have to look at it again tomorrow after my shower.

Two weeks ago I had the distinct honour of watching one of the brown belts in our class test for her black belt. It was really amazing, especially watching some of the kata (pre-arranged routines of moves) that I know. It was kind of like "Hey...I can do that one. But...slower...and much much worse." It goes to show how much can be accomplished when one sets their mind to it. In that vein, I present to you my goals...

1) Daily exercise of one hour or more...1/2 hour of that to be karate.
2) Daily writing of two hours per day. Blogging here doesn't count.
3) Daily affirmation that I can kick ass in whatever I choose.
4) Daily meditation of 15 minutes or so.
5) Daily spiritual communion. (best way I can describe it.)

Wow. Ok...I'm not going to have a lot of time for much other than these goals... :/ Good thing I'm really excited about them. And it actually does give me lots of time...I find that I can do 3-5 all at once. And I'm counting essays and notes for school towards the writing.

Exercise today: 1 1/2 hours of karate

Chemicals

Going to go ingest some chemicals (the Pill), stick some on my arm (hair dye allergy test) and swish some in my mouth (Crest Whitestrips...the peroxide doesn't want to stay on my teeth. :p). Ahhh...isn't it good that I eat organic fruits and vegetables?

Actually, I don't but it's funnier if I pretend for this instance that I do.

Incidentally, having never gotten my hair dyed professionally, do they do an allergy test? Why is it so important that we do one? I'd think that the stuff we get in the drug store is MUCH weaker than the stuff that hairdressers are allowed to use. Anyone know? I'd like to not need to worry about remembering to swab my arm with junk that will stain the sheets burgandy or orange.

Workin'

Insert pithy saying about raining and pouring here.

I met my first student this morning...I'll be teaching him three mornings a week, then I'm meeting my second student tonight. I need to do the whole "impress the parent" thing like crazy though. Apparently our talk on the phone left her with the impression that I'm "childish". Lovely. I mean, I AM childish...just not while tutoring. :p So yeah. I'll be leaving in about an hour...this is after working for six hours today and getting up early two days in a row. I'm kind of tired.

Got my schedule for the craft store today. Honestly, I was expecting to be let go because I told them I couldn't work any night shifts and I couldn't do Saturdays, but I wound up getting 30+ hours next week! Gaahh!! Not that I'm complaining...but I'm really surprised!

And I found $20 on the floor today. That's the second time in a month. :D This pleases me.

Exercise yesterday: 2 hours of Ultimate practice and a 20 minute walk

New taste sensation

Baked potato with salsa and sour cream.

Movie Review

I laughed.

I cried.

It moved me. It made me think about the perils of modern society and the bonds of family and friendship, as well as those bonds which transcend mere friendship and the families that we create by choosing our friends.

The movie? The Punisher. Yeah...weird, I know. I'm totally not joking about any of it either. I really did cry. :p I must be PMS'ing or something. But anyway. Go see it. It's very good.

11 hours? Fsck that.

Title refers to amount of hours I've been scheduled for this week. I got twelve hours last week. This can't go on...I've got bills. So, I have a second job. :) I did tutoring last year for about two years, and took a break from it for a while. Now, however I am "back in the fold" and have gotten two students. Woo! That's $25/hour and 20/half hour, three times a week each. (I'm not sure if ANY of that makes sense. :p)

In other news...I really should have checked my "gauge" (how many stitches to an inch of knitting) with No Name Yet's baby blanket (the major project that I alluded to a couple months ago...if anyone remembers...) Suddenly this so-called "baby blanket" has expanded. I didn't realize it until a couple days ago, but it's definitely more in the "grown-up blanket" category. A small one, but a grown-up blanket none the less. :) It's getting close to being finished...ish... :)

Exercise yesterday: 200 crunches

Best. Quote. Ever.

I tried to find a transcript...this is me trying to remember and being very tired.

Jennifer Garner on Jay Leno talking about why she could never be a CIA operative in real life: "You need to be able to keep secrets if you're in the CIA. My little sister came over to visit me on Friday night to stay for the Easter weekend. I was so excited about her getting her Easter basket. I wanted her to wait until Sunday, but as soon as she came in the door I was like "Are you going to open your Easter basket now?" If you're gonna be a CIA agent, you HAVE TO WAIT UNTIL EASTER!"

Exercise two days ago: walked about a kilometer

Haircut-type post

Today I did my hair and put on makeup before I went over to Candyman's to watch TV with him. Normally I'm not that type of person...I'll just comb my hair and stick barrettes in it, or now that it's long enough, tuck it into a ponytail. Makeup? Not a chance! Not unless I was going out somewhere special, or I got bored while cleaning my room.

I think I'm going to revise my previous ban on makeup and hair products outside of shampoo and conditioner. I looked totally hot tonight! Go me!

WOO!!

Welcome to the world, Drew Nonameyet. :) Hugs and kisses to momma, baby, dad and niece/cousin. And to the best friends who were there the whole time! And! And! Tee hee!! I'm giddy. :)

Got hockey?

Well, we had a good-ish game...mostly because I was there. :) That's all...game tomorrow night in Calgary.

Chatted with K from work today...(Hi K! He's going to try and find this site.) and he's going to get me a day pass to his kickboxing place so we can do some sparring. Muhahaha! I'm going to die. :/ Either that or I'm going to find out that I'm Jennifer Garner. Either way, it should be interesting.

Well...

...it seems there's definitely a babby on the way.

Good luck to everyone in the delivery room. And the babby who hasn't shown up yet, but I wish him/her good luck as well. :)

Maybe a baby?

I feel so inadequate...I'm out here sending love to no name yet and her partner. I wish I could do more for them. :p Oh well! When the baby's here I'll change diapers or something.

Is is real labour? We'll be finding out soon!

Uh oh.

Timestamp: Cramp just hit. I'd better go clean off my bed...I might be in it for the next 24 hours.

Exercise today: fsck that. It's the 2nd Wednesday in the month. I'm not going ANYwhere.

OHYEAHOHYEAHOHYEAH!!

I forgot to mention! I'm going to Game Five for the Canucks tomorrow night! Candyman is taking me!!! Eeeee!! You may all be wildly jealous now. :) Except those who are going so...um...yeah.

Uberproductive!

After spending most of yesterday and the day before lounging around playing free computer games, I finally overdosed yesterday. Yay!! I got some writing done yesterday...I've starting writing fiction again. Candyman has been super helpful with that...encouraging, helping me create writing exercises...etc. A couple days ago he sent me a list of topics that I could write a short story on, less than ten pages, and I have about four pages done on it. Also, last night he gave me a pad of paper, a pen, a topic and thirty minutes and I wrote (in LONGHAND) about two pages. This is fun.

Today I've got a schedule of stuff that I'm working on in my room and I'm finally getting stuff cleaned up from when I had to pull my bathroom apart. While my bathroom looks fabulous (I sometimes will wander in there to do something [brush my teeth etc.] and just stand there in awe for a few minutes) the rest of my room has all the clutter that the bathroom contained. I am planning on organizing it at some point, but I have a fairly major sugar ant infestation that goes in waves...there hadn't been any for a couple days, but there were thirty or so in another spot then. And today I found one on my bed while I was sorting clean laundry to put away. Ugh. I fed it to my Siamese fighting fish.

I'm getting rid of a bunch of underwear, socks and stockings. Does anyone have any opinions about what I could do with them? It's a big bulk of cloth that I'd prefer to not chuck in a landfill. I'm thinking about trying to find an "adult ebay" and auction some of it off. Anyone done that? Is it worth it?

Exercise yesterday: walked about 3 km

"Automatic Game Blocker"

I need something that blocks off all games between x and y o'clock. Maybe I'll actually be able to get some work/writing/knitting/exercising done. :p My AGB is also known as Candyman. :) I started playing something over at his house the other day, and he reached over and shut the window. Hmm...shutting the window. What a great idea. Now all I need to do is visit the Wizard and ask for some will power. Unfortunately it'll turn out it's all inside me already. But I want a nifty little treasure that says "Will Power" on it, dammit!!

Exercise Saturday: some karate
Exercise yesterday: walked about 4 km

Dear Customers,

An open letter to everyone who goes to a store.

Hi there! I'm Karin and I'll be your cashier for today. To make things a little more pleasant for all of us, I'd like you to read and review these simple rules. I'll be with you in just a moment.

1) Please bathe before going out in public. While your cat may like the scent of urine clinging to your clothing, the rest of us humans do not find it nearly as comforting as your feline might.

2) Unfold the bills you hand me. I do have to unfold them, and you only have to unfold one bill, whereas I have to unfold several hundred a day.

3) Please bring the items in your buggy or basket out of said buggy or basket. In the case of the buggy, I am NOT going to lean over the counter to bring every item out of it. And since you are only going to be going through one or two checkouts today YOU can take everything out of your basket. I have over three hundred customers per day. That is a lot of repetitive stress syndrome.

3b) You are allowed to help wrap up the 64 clay pots and 47 pieces of glassware. Especially if there is a line.

4) Read the fine print on the coupon. Yes, it says 1 per customer per day. Yes, it is only between 8 am and 1pm on Friday. No, I can't ring two through for you. No, shouting at me is not going to make me want to help you.

5) I am not going to remember your postal code. I don't care if it's the same one that the last person had, I get three hundred postal codes a day. Also, in between your two postal codes I rang through all your items, told you that the coupon automatically deducts from the highest priced item, told you your total, answered and transferred the phone and counted out your change. NO ONE'S SHORT TERM MEMORY HOLDS ALL THAT!

5a) Don't tell me that I'm "not as lucky as you" because I can't remember more than one postal code. I can and do remember more than one postal code, but not one I've only heard once.

5b) Don't get snippy with me because you feel that I'm "invading your privacy" when I ask you for your postal code. It's company policy and I do it so I don't get fired.

5c) Don't ask me why we're taking postal codes. We have signs up all over saying that we're doing a postal code survey. Read them. They're big. And red.

6) Don't get angry with me because something is on sale and therefore you can't use your coupon. Read the signs. They're there for a reason.

6b) Don't get angry with me because something is not on sale and the sign is in the wrong place. I am not responsible for every sign in a 3000 square foot store.

7) Don't call me by my first name unless you actually know me. It confuses me because I think that I've forgotten who you are. The name tag is so that you can complain or compliment to the manager, and so that the absent minded district manager can pretend to remember who we are.

8) Don't get pissy with me because I can't leave my cash register. I'll gladly call someone over for you, or I can point you in any direction you'd like.

9) Wait on hold for more than 30 seconds. Calling back doesn't make the person you're wanting to talk to free any faster.

10) Don't put coins or your card on the counter when I have my hand out reaching for it. Some of us don't have nails to pick up that stuff. Besides, you get upset with me when I put YOUR stuff on the counter.

10a) Don't get upset when I put your money or card back on the counter...especially when you're talking on your cell phone, or to someone else.


Thank you for following these simple rules of courtesy. Thank you for shopping with us and have a great day.

Karin

I have to be at work at WHAT time?!

I finished work at 945. I need to be there at 0745 tomorrow. Fsck. To junk food, then to bed. Much sleeping must ensue.

Oh, and I feel much better. The nasty email didn't go through apparently. :D Happy.

Anger is healthy, right?

This isn't really representative of my site...don't be scared off... ;)

Over the last several months I have sometimes had occasion to be furious with people. (Usually at work...) Mindless rage where my mouth tastes like pennies, my fight or flight reflex kicks in giving me a knotted stomach and I actually feel slightly lightheaded. This would be the kind of absolute crazed frustration and fury which I would come home and it would affect me several hours later, especially when I was trying to go to sleep, by invading my head with images of me stabbing someone through the temple. Repeatedly. With a big smile on my face.

I tend to not get this way often. Thank goodness...I'm sure it's not really all that healthy, especially if I wind up acting on these impulses. Hrm. Yeah...probably not such a great idea. Usually when I feel slighted or upset I just shrug it off or have a minor hissy fit, and then it's OVER. Except recently I've been having these fantasies about doing serious bodily harm to people who have pissed me off...who have just acted stupidly for no particular reason, and should be immediately removed from the gene pool before they pee in it any further.

So last night/this morning I was feeling this way towards myself. I haven't felt this way in several years. I used to have medium sized issues about "stuff". Self esteem stuff...cutting myself...but I was getting SO much better. Hadn't even used myself for Exacto practice in...probably six years now. Last night was bad. I took offense at something someone said...and have you ever been completely pissed off at something...knowing that it's pretty irrational, but still feeling justified that you're angry...even though you aren't REALLY sure if you should be? Yeah...that was me earlier. So I fumed for a while, playing Yahoo Games, (until past 5 am) blogging a little, reading my blogroll. Oh, and emailing what I remember to be a really nasty retort to the entire episode. I finally went downstairs and tossed and turned until almost six while visions of unhealthy masochistic sharp objects danced through my head, along with the knowledge that seventeen steps from my bed was a bottle of vodka in the freezer and three steps to the left was an entire liquor cabinet filled with cream based girly drinks. Enough to knock all these nasty thoughts out of my head for a couple hours and make me feel less guilty for flying off the handle and sending out nasty writing when it really wasn't justified.

I am pleased to report that I managed to avoid both alcoholic indulgences and various sharp objects. Now I'm feeling better, and I would like to send out a public apology to the people who got splashed with my angst of last night. This morning. Whatever.

You may all return to your regularly scheduled happy, if very tired since I only got 5 hours of sleep, Karin.

My dirty little secret

Sometimes, I really like to read romance novels. This is less due to the dirty bits (although that was my main motivation when I was in junior high) and more to do with the inane, sappy endings. Yup. I admit it. I'm sappy and romantic...at least when it comes to occasional escapist reading. The thing that I like best about romance novels (and romantic movies...watching Breakfast at Tiffany's the other night brought this on) is that the movie/book always ends at one of the most sappy parts of a relationship. The characters are at the point where they've overcome all the odds which conspired to keep them apart and they have chosen to remain together. Get married, whatever. The thing is, they don't continue on. There is no "stealing the covers" scene unless it's cute and can be resolved. The in-laws don't come in to visit. They never mention hot water overuse, children being anything other than wonderful and supportive or insensitive little comments which are tossed out by both parties. It all ends on a high note without mundanity (I know that's not a real word, but it's 4 am.) The women are always beautiful, strong and swept off their feet. The men are always kind, strong and sweep really well. The book/movie ends with both parties getting what they wanted...each other. And that's all that they need...until the morning after, which we never get to read about!

This is in no way a commentary on my relationship (so please don't be mad. I'm not airing dirty laundry). :) It's just a frustration that I have with all that escapist fiction. Several series of novels are very good in that they follow the exploits of multiple generations of families and so the reader gets to see that wow! Things WEREN'T happily ever after forever. This is good to realize. It is healthy. And it assists those of us who grew up on Disney and "happily ever after" that it doesn't work like that 24/7/365 (366 on leap years). Hell if I can remember what those books are...One series is by Sara Douglass and it's called "Starman" or something.

I guess what I'm getting at is that those books are like those dreams that you have where it's an amazing dream. It's so wonderful. Everything is perfect...maybe you're in your favorite fantasy world, or your dream job or something...then you wake up. Oh. Crap. Back to Mundania. Reading these books is kind of like watching good porn...it's idealized fantasy and it makes your own world look so much less magical.

Hoo. That was a mouthful.

Ooh! Good Schedule!

I just realized that I'm not working Wednesday or Thursday, which means that I get to watch the first two Canucks playoff games. So...therefore I will need to bring my toque, jersey and shirt to C/M's house, plus my car flag...and maybe I'll even buy the gi-normous Canucks flag that we have at work. (29.99 minus twelve dollars [40% coupon] plus tax...might be able to swing that now that I've returned the medicine chest. [Da new vun is MUCH better. /Svedish agsent.])

Exercise today: Um...I thought about walking. Really did. And I um...walked to the returns desk at Ikea. Carrying something heavy. Does any of that count?

o/~ OCD and ADD, those are the letters that are right for me! o/~

Sometimes I really hate the internet. It's a super time eater for me, and the fact that I have tendencies similar to those letters in the title makes it that much more difficult. I have a really short attention span and lose interest in things easily, which is one of the reasons I started this blog in the first place. I needed to have somewhere that I could easily write up my goals and get a good idea of what I was doing and how well I was doing. However, this blog itself has turned into a time eater. Not writing, really...since I don't update super frequently or with very long posts generally. But, if I were to take all the time that I'd spent reading my blogroll (or obsessively going to all the blogs on it, even the ones that are really good about pinging) and/or comics, I would have at least another half hour in each day. This could be better used on cleaning my room, cataloguing books, reading, doing coursework (next semester), trying to write a good Canadian novel...etc.

So, I'm going to Ikea to return my medicine cabinet so I have enough money for rent. :p What a pain. I'll probably rebuy it in two months...but it's annoying.

Exercise today: Nothing yet. I'll see about walking to work...I'm almost out of gas and money.

Ugh

Worked today. Got to deal with a brand new supervisor, which wasn't too bad. The major issue that I have with the management at work is that twice now they've hired someone and within two or three shifts they've made them supervisors. That's not even enough time to get used to the cash system, let alone trying to teach them all the supervisor stuff. This girl didn't even get one shift before they stuck her into that position. Personally I think this is a really good way to get people to quit. And since management is whining about not having enough people (despite the fact that they've got several people on the payroll who haven't gotten hours in two weeks) this is not a very good way to do things.

So, how was YOUR day? After work was good. Walked with Justy a bit, then did a junk food run and watched "Breakfast at Tiffany's". I love that movie. :) I see way too much of myself in Holly Golightly. And my stomach is kind of sad now. No more junk food runs!! They make my stomach sad. :(

Exercise today: walked around LaFarge Lake twice...I think that's about two km.

Weekend to End Breast Cancer

I'd been thinking about doing this fundraiser for a while, but when I saw Peechie was doing it, I got a swift kick in the butt and figured that I ought to give it a try. I'm going to be doing a bunch of walking over the next little while and see if my hips and knees and every other weak part of my body can keep up. So, there isn't a full commitment yet, but I'm definitely leaning in the direction of "I'm gonna do this." Look for a registration notice in the next week or so. I should be getting a pamphlet and going to an orientation within that time and fully deciding.

It's summer. Ish.

The smell of suntan lotion, at least the kind that C/M wears, always brings the "summer" feeling to me. The fact that today was absolutely gorgeous really helped as well.

I'm feeling a lot better than I did yesterday. Good thing...I work tomorrow again.

Exercise today: 2 hours of Ultimate practice, 30 minutes (roughly 3 km) walking

First Intermission

Current score: Canucks 1, Edmonton 1

I was bad today. I missed karate for the second time in two weeks. This fscking flu is completely knocking me out. I sometimes have to pause for breath coming up stairs, let alone going to karate for two hours. It still pisses me off though. I'll definitely be going to Ultimate practice tomorrow, but I don't know how much I'll be able to do.

Last night C/M and I went to see Hellboy with a friend of ours and when we went back down in the elevator to the parkade it was completely choked with smoke smell...there didn't seem to be any visible smoke. I couldn't breathe and began coughing so hard I was gagging and retching. This continued the entire ride back to C/M's house where I discovered that my stomach was in knots and completely cramped up. I wound up finally falling asleep on C/M's couch where I stayed until 830 this morning.

I feel better now, but still pretty crappy. :(